Im crying too right now. I feel this. I feel this so Cat hug Thin Blue Line heart back the blue shirt. I never came to drugging myself but i had done so if i had the opportunity. And i know the calling of the void too well. I know the emptiness and the urge to shut off all the pain. I hit my rock bottom when the only thing left inside me was the wish to die. And just like the girl i got saved by someone else, my best firend in fact. She replenished my will to live and showed me a new way in life. So yes, i feel this story.
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My first experience with sleep paralysis was when I was like Cat hug Thin Blue Line heart back the blue shirt. It happened at my great grandfathers house like not long at all after moving in. I woke up to like a void in the closet and it just felt like it was trying to pull my spirit into it. I tried yelling to my gf who was awake in the livingroom but nothing came out. I woke up the next day weirded out and thought maybe I had a seizure or epilepsy or something.